Tell me about the day I was born...

Today while we were having lunch at home, Evan says, "Tell me about the day I was born." So I tell him the story and I get the small little photo album of his stay at the hospital and show him the pictures. I point out the stuffed frog in one of the photos and he asks if it's the same one that's in his room and runs to get it. He compares the eyes of the frog to the one in the picture and agrees, it's the same one. He looks at all the pictures and holds his frog and when I am done telling him about the day he was born he adds, "Do you want to talk about the day I was born?"

We just did! So I ask what else he wanted to know and he tells me he wants to know about the hospital. What about it? "Can we go there," he asks. I said, "You want to go there? We can go there." So we went. I had often thought about going back. The day we left OHSU they said, "Come back and visit," and I always thought I would, but never did. Until today, that is. Evan grabbed the frog, the photo album and off we went.

I told him on the drive that I wasn't sure if I would remember how to get there, but I hoped it would all come back to me. I missed a turn or two and Evan was sure to tell me I was doing a great job driving! The drive up the hill is really spectatular and Evan mentioned that he wished we could camp there. Why they built a hospital at the top of a very lush hill escapes me, but Evan saw it as a great campsite!

Once we got to the hospital, I took a picture of Evan at the front door standing on the OHSU mat. We have a picture of Papa holding the infant carrier with Evan in it, and me beside him on the day we left this place forever, the last day of August, 2003. It's sort of a special place to be standing.

We made our way to the 12th floor where the special "little" babies live until they can go home. I picked up the phone outside the door that is controlled by security and said I had a former preemie with me and we would like to visit. Once in we were told that we really couldn't get a tour of the place but were asked if there was someone in particular we wanted to see. Yikes. I remember so few names of the many people who were there for us during that time, but I did remember one name, Patty. She was the red-haired nurse who carried Evan away to the NICU the second he was born and who was with him the first 4 days. So I told the man that the only one I knew by name was Patty. He went and got her! I couldn't have planned this if I had wanted to!

Patty had been so great to me those first days and then I never saw her again. We got moved to a different section of the NICU and that was the end of Patty. Today Patty said she remembered me and said how terrific Evan turned out. He showed her the frog and I explained that I bought this frog on one of my wheelchair rides to the gift shop. It was Evan's first gift. Patty thanked us for stopping by and suggested we visit the cafeteria and get a snack....so we did.

Evan thought the cafeteria was the neatest thing. He handed out trays and went to look at our choices. Big surprise, a doughnut. This "bear-claw" was a surprise...truely the best pastry I have ever tasted! If you're ever at OHSU...treat yourself to one! Evan noticed some people who looked like doctors and was sure to ask, "Are you a doctor?"

From there we headed up to 14 to see the floor I was on during my bed rest. Even though this hospital is huge, it all came back to me. I wanted to show Evan what a hosptial room looks like but all of the doors were closed except one. 2 nurses were in there and said that they were just cleaning up and that the room was empty. As I chatted with the nurse about why were there, she said I looked familiar and I agreed. Yes, she remembered me, the visits with my "mom's club" and even asked if we owned a Quiznos!

While standing in the room I asked the room number and she said 54. 1454. I told her I had a strong feeling that this was the EXACT room I was in 5 years ago. I showed Evan my bed, the seat where Daddy slept and my bathroom. He thought this whole trip was pretty cool and I think it might have been a little therapeutic for me. The view used to be spectacular from this room but now is not so much. Buildings have been built and there is no longer the view of Mt. St Helens there once was. (When I got home, I checked my scrapbook to see my room number - 1454!) Can you imagine!?

Julia and Evan smiled for a picture before we said good-bye. Julia even surprised me by saying, "I saw you at Haggen once when Evan was really little." I couldn't believe it. I asked if we had spoken and she said she tries to give people their space and waits for them to remember her. She said I didn't seem to notice her that day but she remembers me there with my stroller. Wow. We made a really neat connection that probably made her day too. Julia suggested we go down to 9 and ride the tram which was being build while I was there. We went down to 9.

As it turns out, the cool TRAM is not operating on Sunday. Evan and I walked out onto the 9th floor patio and took in the great view from here of Mt. Hood and Mt. St. Helens. Naturally Evan wanted to know if the TRAM is working tomorrow and if we could come back.

When we got home, Evan had some quiet time and played with his trucks on the carpet. He often talks to himself in what I call a sing song sort of way and tells the story of what's going on in his little world of play, "Come on, let's go, the ambulance is here. We're going to the hospital. Hurry, let's go..."

Then, "Mom, did the ambulance come to the house?"

"No, I drove myself to one hospital and then they took me to the hospital on the hill in the ambulance."

"Where did you sit?" he wondered.

"I was laying down." I said.

"Did you have your seat belt on? Like how there's a seat belt on the helicopter we saw last week?" he wants to know.

"Yes, I probably did." (All I know is that the guy with me in the ambulance was talking to me about how he was going to go boating that day. Now I get that he was probably trying to distract my worried mind...)

Tonight at bedtime, Evan said, "Do you want to talk about our day?" And we went through it all over again.