The Case for Homeschooling...

Today I subbed. A second grade class with by far the worst behavior I have witnessed in all my days as a teacher or a substitute. The note from the teacher indicated that it would likely be an exceptionally difficult day for me. 6 kids on behavior modification plans.

The assistant principal came to introduce himself. He said I might have a challenging day.

You know when you've been warned, it's not going to be good.

I couldn't begin to describe today to you. I was frusrated beyond measure. I thought about becoming sick myself in order to get a new sub in here to finish the day. Were it not for recess, lunch, another recess and gym, I may not have made it through.

What really breaks my heart, as a mother, is that MY SON might end up in a class like this. And, if he did, it would change who he is for the worse. It would break my heart if I were to step into Evan's class in the future to find children like I witnessed today. No child should have to be subjected to such behavior as this. The "good ones" get totally left behind. What message does that send? And we have no choice by HAVE to deal with the others.

I didn't get to spend time teaching today. I spent my day managing one act of poor behavior after another. It wasn't silly kids being silly because there was a sub here. Something bigger is going on. And, to be honest, it wouldn't help me a bit to know what each child has been labeled as or diagnosed with. All I know is that if MY SON had to come to school every day and sit in THIS, he would hate school. And maybe, as a parent I wouldn't believe him when he tells me how bad it is. But as a teacher, I would. He would not become the person he was meant to be.

I appologized to the kids at the end of the day. I turned the lights off and told the kids, "If you were kind, a good listener, helpful to me in any way, hard working, etc., please know I DID notice you. I wish I had more time to spend with you. If you were not any of those things, you have some changes that need to be made. I WILL NOT BE BACK to this classroom again." I have never said that before and I think the kids were shocked. When the vice principal commented, "You made it," out at the buses. I agreed, I had made it, but told him I wouldn't be back. I coud tell he understood.

When handing out the 6 detailed behavior plans for those kids to take home, my wost 2 wondered how many STARS they had on there sheet. ZERO. I told them in the real world you have to work and follow the rules to get STARS. You didn't, so you don't. They seemed really surprised. These kids are 7. I wonder what will become of them by 18.

Did learning happen today? For them? I doubt it.

Maybe a couple took in something I said aobut Salt, Rocks, and Minerals. I am not sure.

I learned. I learned that I need to reconsider the whole homeschool option. It's something I have thought about but never done much to learn more. It's a huge sacrifice and I wonder when I would get my 'downtime'. For Evan's sake, I need to explore my options.

THIS is not okay with me. Nothing about today was okay with me. (Oh happy day, I leave for Michigan tomorrow.)